Week 4: Recovering a Sense of Integrity
Integrity: firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values
Artist Pages and Revelations of Self
The text of this chapter mostly revolved around the morning pages; how the morning pages reveal ourselves, and how that revelation is the thing that should come through in our ART.
The chapter begins with describing how the morning pages reveal our true selves, both things we want more of and things we want less of. As we face the things that we don't like, we will find that we will want to change, and then we will start to take the actions to change.
My summary is that Julia is telling us to recover our sense of integrity we need to processes (like morning pages) to act as a mirror, and when faced with our reflection (truth) we will inevitably act on it.
She warns us that it won't be pleasant, that there will be turmoil. As we change, there is turbulence: a tantrum, aka the sanskrit term kriya meaning spiritual emergency or surrender.
Affirmations
Again we are told about affirmations. That we should/could use morning pages for affirmitive statements of ourselves.
Reading Deprivation (Media Fast)
For me, I need to extend this to a media fast, as I don't really read any physical media, but I do scroll Reddit primarily, and a couple other websites. To my interpretation it seems what we gain is the time and perspective to do other things, things which are productive differently, to act in the ways of which we are - to have more integrity. I'm curious to see how the rest of you do - I'm writing this on day 2, and so far I have not started my media fast yet, but I endeavor to!
Tasks
This week I categorized the tasks as Likes, Boundaries, Reflection, Affirmation
Likes: Describe your ideal environment, what do you like in that?
Likes: Describe yourself at 80, what did you do that you enjoyed?
Likes: Describe yourself at 8 years old, what did you like?
Boundaries: Where in your house could you create a private environemnt for maximum creativity?
Reflection: Review your life pie from week 1, how has it changed?
Affirmation: Write your own Artist's Prayer
Affirmation: Go an extended artist's date
Boundaries: Throw out old stuff in your closet, make space for the new
Reflection: Look at a situation in your life you should change...
Reflection: If you break the reading deprivation/media fast, what happened?
Morning pages; 6 days, 7? I lost count. I get blocks writing them, because I wanted to study something else or play.
Date; I played to my co-workers and they said thank you. I had messed up, but I didn't feel bad, because of my intention to bring levity.
Today on April 4th, I had finished taxes at 4:44pm. 444 means angelic presence, stability, and protection. I also saw the word HATER written on the board the morning after I told my mother that I would not want to be friends with my father. When I commuted to work on bike, I listened to the Erhu and it reminded me of Final Fantasy 10. https://youtu.be/ZvrMaJ1Nkow?si=_0E2T04hgWCCZYgZ
Yes, my mother heard restlessness in my voice when I told her about microplastics from plastic containers for olive oil and whatever emotion she picks up from me multiplies by six and goes against the grain with my father. I was angry at the way things were, but this is a healthy sign of breaking from old ways. Some days, I would vacillate at two and a half pages and pass it off as three pages. Co-worker troubles would bleed into my writing. Inside security officers would give bike patrol the evil eye, because we sit around and stare at empty lots while they handle moneys contaminated by emotions from all kinds of guests.